"I remember just sitting on the couch for a few days, all numb, asking myself: 'What's going on?'"
Olympian Miriam Glez was completely surprised when she returned from the first Olympic Games in which she participated.
"You've just suddenly come back to reality and you have to adjust to what's normal."
For most athletes, it is no surprise that their adrenaline rushes when they arrive at the Olympic Games and prepare for competition.
But what shocks many is how psychologically they sink when the Games are over, a phenomenon known as post-Olympic depression.
The artistic swimmer says she thought she felt so empty in part because she suddenly stopped an intense training regimen and her body lacked the adrenaline and dopamine produced by extreme exercise.
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Miriam adds that she also felt isolated.
Her family flew in from France to support her at the Sydney Games and were still abroad when she returned home.
After the Games, the coaches and other staff at the pool where she trained in Paris went on vacation.
"I had no support," she says.
Miriam's experience is not unusual at all.
Dr Karen Howells, a senior lecturer in sports psychology at Cardiff University in Wales, who studies post-Olympic depression, says performing at the Games is a very intense experience for athletes.
"In the Olympic Village, they have everything they need, a team available 24 hours a day, the food they want, sports massage."
Athletes also get huge media attention, but once the Games are over, it all disappears almost overnight.
"Research shows they are treated similarly to celebrities".
"And after everything, a big void remains," she adds.
"It's a bit like a wedding.
"You get engaged, you're getting ready for the wedding, it's that fairy tale you've always dreamed of and you're marrying the person of your dreams."
"And the next day you wake up and realize that nothing has changed".
When you are so dedicated to the sport, it can be a big disappointment.
"I started doing artistic swimming when I was six years old," says Miriam.
"Every decision and everything I did was for the sake of sport.
"When I was 14 years old, I moved to Paris to train there".
"People often start playing sports very early," adds Dr. Howels.
"They direct their whole life towards that goal".
Depression occurs at a time when many athletes can suddenly eat and drink whatever they want, sometimes after years of strict diets.
"They resort to inappropriate ways to reduce stress and anxiety," explains Dr. Howells.
"Athletes talk about crazy parties, drinking, and this can push them even deeper into problems, before it will be helpful."
Surprisingly, the level of success athletes achieve at the Games does not affect the severity of post-Olympic depression.
"It doesn't depend on whether they won a gold medal or didn't achieve their goals," says Dr. Howells.
He gives the example of Adam Piti, a British swimmer and winner of three gold and three silver medals at three different Olympics, who spoke openly about his mental problems.
He said in interviews: "You think [winning the gold] will solve all your problems. He won't".
Through her research, Dr. Howels discovered that the consequences for athletes can be severe.
"In extreme cases, the symptoms can be depression, and in some cases suicidal thoughts," she says.
Although this area has not been studied enough to arrive at accurate data on the scale of the problem, there are more and more people who believe that athletes need more support after major competitions.
The International Olympic Committee (IOC) has helped train 148 people in 76 countries as part of efforts to ensure better care for competitors at the 2024 Paris Games.
"It's about providing them with ongoing support," says Kirsty Burrows, head of the IOC's Safe Sport Department.
"This means providing people who will support them, because we know that problems can arise in the period after the Games because then they lose their support network".
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After the Olympic Games in Paris, athletes will have a support service available 24 hours a day in more than 70 languages, which they can contact by call or text for up to four years after the Games.
After leaving artistic swimming, Miriam worked in business and sports administration, but now runs the non-profit organization Duša sportista (Athlete's Soul).
The organization, whose members are former competitors, supports athletes when they decide to end their careers and raises awareness of the challenges they face in retirement.
"We publish a lot of content that helps the mental health of our athlete community, and we also offer group and individual counseling," says Miriam.
Although many athletes have access to sports psychologists, Dr. Howells says they are reluctant to talk to them because, frankly, they are often funded by the same body that selects the teams for the Olympics.
They fear that asking for help may be seen as a sign of weakness and will diminish their chances of being selected for national Olympic teams.
Dr. Howells says that competitors find former Olympians the most useful for advice and support.
"They felt that the best support they could get was from those who had already been through it all," she says.
"It is really necessary to provide support to the athletes, support during the preparations for the Games, as well as to understand what they can experience after the competition".
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