There may be anxiety attacks when we scroll through our phones on the first morning of January. Social networks will be ruled by the lucky ones who were celebrated from Belgrade to the Far East, and there won't be that filter that would beautify your four walls that haven't watched Jupol for a long time. You will be exposed to malicious online attacks with Moet and buffet tables, to which you will not be able to retaliate with Russian salad and kumar, who is also your guarantor. You won't be able to replicate the traditional fireworks display over Konik either, although it is no weaker than the one in Sydney. And if you haven't already watched Brena and Priya, you have nothing to brag about Knez even though he can sing and sell burgers.
Instead of falling into holiday depression and looking at family members like Hannibal Lecter, turn up the Vienna Philharmonic and look at things on the bright side. Horoscopes and exposition say that a year of happiness-happiness-joy awaits our homeland, so I guess there will be something for us as well.
To begin with, from January we will be one year closer to joining the EU planned for 2026. The President has already prepared a platform that opens the doors of Brussels, but it takes time for everyone to sign it. Ursula and Borelj did not receive the prime minister, but Varhelji whispered to him that he would close some chapters for us. Our only task is to build a judicial district in Zabjelo and finish the prison in Mojkovac. We can fill the prosecutor's office with godfathers and comrades, just as we reformed the Constitutional Court. When we open the Special Court for Organized Crime, we will put a cardboard model of the Hand of Justice at the entrance with the dedication - Thank you for finding work for the judiciary.
For the new year, the Government made pensioners happy, but other mortals should not worry either. By this time next year, we won't be millionaires, but we'll have salaries of a thousand euros and work six days a week. Jabe Dritan asks about the continuation of Europe now, and Fidelity says that the prime minister is buying time. There will be raises, although the PIO Fund may not be. The budget will be filled with excise taxes and new loans, until Montenegro becomes the Switzerland of the Balkans and a large construction site. Tenders for highways and expressways will be finished before you say "puff-puff", so Bemax and Bechtel's wheels can be driven into the ground.
The blockchain fraternity from the coast will ensure that the state treasury overflows. When Do Kwon wins the American judiciary like Šešelj the Hague Court, he will receive an apology from Dritan and Montenegrin citizenship from Miki. We will open the vault of the Central Bank for him and Buterin to gamble on blockchain exchanges until we return all the loans and collect money for two more highways. At the same time, we can develop elite tourism in which carp and lobsters are paid for with digital money, and rich guests are offered only domestic ones. Cigarettes from Bar, weed from plantations in the villages around Podgorica or cocaine from packages of bananas.
While crypto-serdars fill the state coffers, the army of ministers will be able to peacefully spend their daily wages and drive official cars. Aleksa will continue to be the Deputy Prime Minister for receptions and natural disasters, while Milović will be in charge of the police and prosecutor's office. Having succeeded in disrupting the fashion of tight navy suits with pastel details, the dandy minister may also begin filling out the diplomatic network. The head of the parliament will continue to travel to Belgrade without the costume of a state official, and the president's advisers will continue to play ministers when some ministers are already playing ikebana.
There are high expectations from the year of political changes, in which Jakov and Miki do not mention divorce, but Milan and Andrija grow further and further apart. In which the retired father of the nation takes pictures with voters on the streets, while the party chooses his successor through an application. He will choose someone from the clone army to make up the party and try to get it home with Mickey when he has to choose between new elections and reconstruction. The hand of justice can hope for a new election chance if it does not lose its voice or fight in the parliament by then. And if he doesn't get the chance to be the king on the scales again, he can share the tag #medojesveupravu with Medo and talk about tidbits from the enthronement.
So let's not be sad this morning, because we are waiting for a year of reforms and a two-thirds majority. We are one step away from happiness and life in the Singapore of Europe, which does not regret loans so that citizens can live like a kidney in fat. Let's wish progress to the state of the people and the civil minority in which electoral and census victories build harmony, and unemployed youth move from betting shops to political parties. A land of justice where the telephones come to the heads of criminals, but the judges can't do anything with the listings and vettings. In which there will be reforms and agendas, until joy hits us all on the nose.
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