It's true that everyone kisses in their own way, but there are ways you can improve this skill.
Although you can hear, see and read a lot about sex, no one offers instructions on kissing. And if it doesn't suit the partner, dating is unlikely to turn into a real relationship.
That's why scientists tackled this topic and discovered several secrets of successful kissing.
Kissing is important
Research has shown that the frequency of kissing greatly affects relationship satisfaction. Scientists have proven that the 'amount' of kisses in a couple is proportional to their satisfaction in the relationship.
59 percent of men and 66 percent of women said that they broke up because their partner was not a good kisser, and it is also interesting that most people (up to 90 percent) remember better the details related to the first romantic kiss than to the first sex.
Movies, like 'Pretty Woman', have convinced us that prostitutes don't kiss because a kiss on the mouth is too intimate an act, which is actually true.
Apparently, by separating from kisses on the mouth, prostitutes manage to separate emotions from work, according to a study that confirmed that not kissing has been part of the prostitute code since time immemorial.
It is also interesting that men who kiss their women before going to work live an average of five years longer, earn 20 to 30 percent more money and are less likely to have a traffic accident, according to a 10-year German study conducted in 1980- them.
Psychologists do not believe that the kiss itself causes these changes, but that a man who greets a woman with a kiss is more likely to start the day with a more positive attitude, which leads to a healthier lifestyle.
Why are we kissing?
With a kiss, we test whether someone is (biologically speaking) a suitable partner for us, according to scientists. The exchange of scent, touch, and body posture triggers subconscious mechanisms that help us decide if we should continue, and there is also the possibility that a kiss may indicate a potential partner's commitment to the relationship and genetic compatibility.
In Cheryl Kirshenbaum's book, 'The Science of Kissing: What Our Lips Are Telling Us', it is pointed out that there are big differences in how the sexes perceive a kiss. It is much more important to women, who are more focused on a man's teeth and hygiene, while men see kissing more as a step towards sex.
Of course, there are also big differences in the perception of kissing among different cultures.
How to find out if someone wants to kiss you?
This question incites more nervousness than anything else related to kissing. All scientists agree that you can be convinced that your partner wants it when he enters your private space (approaches you), in a convincing way and studies your reaction to his act.
It's important to be aware, whether your intentions are romantic or not, that any kiss requires a person to enter your private space, and for them to come so close to you there must be a certain level of trust or expectation. That's why kissing or a simple kiss on the cheek is an unspoken expression of acceptance.
Girl-hunting expert David D'Angelo advises men to fix a girl's hair, as it's an intimate enough gesture to see if she's interested or not. If she flinches or moves away, it's better to back off, but if she shows relaxation, the man can 'move on' without any problems.
Advice for women
During the writing of the book 'The Art of Kissing', William Kane asked men what they would complain about the most, but also what they find most attractive when kissing is involved.
He found that men wanted women to open their mouths more (i.e. kiss 'wetter with more tongue action'), initiate kisses and be more aggressive with the tongue and be more active.
Advice for men
In the same book, Kane offered some advice to the 'stronger' sex as well.
1. Don't stick your tongue down her throat, because that's what women complain about the most.
2. Listen to his breathing. Rather, let her breathe, and don't suffocate her.
3. 'Listen' to her kissing and follow her pace.
Also, men should pay more attention to oral hygiene, because no matter how attractive someone is, if their mouth stinks, it will turn any woman away. Because women pay more attention to taste and smell than men.
In addition, 53 percent of women prefer to kiss freshly shaved men, their favorite place to kiss after the mouth is their neck, and women often complain that men kiss in the same way all the time instead of changing techniques and speed.
It's not all about technique
As Sun Tzu stated, "All wars are won or lost before they even begin." To a large extent, this also applies to kisses.
Namely, you can be a great kisser, but if you behave in such a way that no one wants to kiss you at all, it's a shame for your skill. Circumstances can also ruin your chances.
That's why Kirshenbaum summarized a few essential things that can help you (or, if you're missing them, help you) on the way to the kiss:
1. Looking good is important, so try to look good.
2. Set the scene. Get to know each other before jumping on the person you like and everything will go more smoothly.
3. Context matters. Choose the right time and environment.
4. Know your potential partner's likes and dislikes. Kissing is not an Olympic sport, but what matters is what a certain person enjoys, which varies from person to person, so get to know them in order to show yourself in the best light, advises Time.
Bonus video:
