Everyone wants to be a great lover, but while it's crucial that your partner's energy and yours match, there are a number of things you can actively influence and change or adjust to your mutual satisfaction.
First of all, we should start by dispelling the illusions instilled in us by various movies, and then we should focus on safe access and overcoming the shame that can arise when we start asking each other questions about preferences and boundaries...
Change your attitude towards pornography
In order to progress as a lover, it's important to understand that real sexuality and the enjoyment of intimacy have nothing to do with pornography, which has probably already given you a bunch of wrong ideas about what sex can and should be like. Pornographic content can be a form of entertainment, but as a guide in sex (without consulting a partner) it leads to unpleasant consequences. If you believe it's okay to engage in kinky acts without asking for approval, then you really need to seriously rethink the role of porn in your sex education, he says. WannabeMagazine.
Practice safe sex
Sex isn't fun if you take risks. And you should know that the partner risks much more - in addition to sexually transmitted diseases, she also risks an unwanted pregnancy. If you want a woman with you to be relaxed, surrender to you and enjoy, provide her with safe sex.
Put consultation and consent into practice
You can't just silently enter into sex, although many men do it, without consulting about basic things - protection, foreplay, what you specifically like, and which can unpleasantly surprise your partner and even traumatize her (roughness, for example), if you don't ask for permission.
Asking for consent isn't complicated, but it's something that many men don't learn, and it's very important. If you want to be a good lover, make an effort to talk, to warn, to ask – even if it feels like you've already been given 'tacit' permission.
Meet sex toys
For many men, the thought of competing with a battery-powered toy that never tires or loses an erection is terrifying, but incorporating toys into intercourse can be fun for both of you, if you're willing to overcome resistance to a "tool" you haven't used yet. . It can be a joint research in which you will have fun and expand your experiences.
Make a Yes/No/Maybe list
Whether you're single or in a relationship, it's helpful to understand your own desires and know your limits. A great way to do this is to make a list - the concept is simple - go through different sexual acts and mark "Yes", "No", or "Maybe" your level of interest in them.
If you're in a relationship, you can fill out your lists separately and then compare them, so you can easily see what you agree on, where you're less aligned, and how to overcome it. It can be awkward to reveal your fetishes and fantasies, but if you commit to it honestly and lead a discussion, you will have the opportunity to better understand each other's sexuality and better meet your partner's needs. If you're single, a list can help you when you're asked to try things you haven't done before.
Ask more questions
It can be very unsexy when you ask questions, because you don't know exactly what your partner wants you to do, or how to do it, but it's only for a moment - going on "blind" can be painful for both of you, so it's much better to you ask questions, encourage the other person to guide you, and then do your best to follow the instructions. A good lover is above all sensitive to the partner's needs.
Don't just focus on penetration
Sex is much more than penetration. Although you believe that erection and persistence are the main thing, you may find that the pleasure you give the other person during foreplay is the best part of the relationship, and penetration is only the finishing touch - and it can be spectacular, if you are both on the same level of passion and excitement. Once you understand this and discover how to practice it, you can have a much better and richer sex life.
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