Violence against women as everyday life: They suffer out of fear for themselves and their children

I endured verbal violence for two years, and after the physical violence, I reacted immediately, with the help of close people. I found shelter in Podgorica's Safe Women's House, where I stayed for two and a half months, Dragan from Podgorica told "Vijesti" (not his real name, the identity is known to the editorial office).

Dragana says that each woman, a beneficiary of the Podgorica SŽK shelter, contributed to her stay and recovery in her own way with her story.

Working with psychologists, she points out, additionally influenced and empowered her to look at life in a different way.

"We were each other's support and protection. I still have contact and good friendship with some of the users of the SŽK. "Working with psychologists in a safe house, and how it helped me, I look at many things differently", says Dragana.

She said that at the Safe Women's House, they are extremely dedicated to their work and "make sure that every victim is encouraged and equipped for further independent living."

"The house is equipped with everything necessary for children (toys, fairy tales, books, various board games) and is adapted for everyone," she explained.

Data from the Police Directorate show that 441 criminal acts of violence in the family or family community were recorded last year. Of the 517 victims of domestic violence, 380 are women.

Last year, 627 women sought some form of protection and help in the Safe Women's House (SŽK) in Podgorica.

Last year, 95 people stayed in the shelters of this non-governmental organization - 38 women and 57 children.

"The psychological violence that every woman goes through in violence reduces their capacities, and they feel that they have no strength or do not know if they can lead an independent life, independent of their partner. In addition, women are also afraid of abusers, they are afraid that they will take away their children, they do not have the support of the environment...", according to the SŽK.

35 people in shelters for half a year

SŽK told "Vijesta" that in six months of this year, help was provided to 304 women.

They point out that, after the initial consultation with the beneficiaries, in accordance with their needs, comprehensive help and support is provided.

They state that the beneficiaries have at their disposal psychological and legal assistance, mediation in contact with institutions, as well as accommodation in one of the two shelters in Podgorica. In addition, parenting and self-help workshops, as well as educational and creative workshops for children, are organized for SŽK users.

They remind that they provide accommodation services to women with children who are victims of domestic violence.

"The safe women's house provides accommodation in a shelter for women and children who are victims of domestic violence, and it often happens that children and their mothers also stay in the shelter. During the year 2022, 95 people (38 women and 57 children) stayed in the shelter of the Safe Women's House, while during the first half of 2023, 35 people (14 women and 21 children) stayed," this NGO said.

By the end of June, 187 criminal acts of domestic violence

According to the data of the Police Administration, 2022 criminal acts of violence in the family or family community were committed in 441.

UP officials also recorded 39 other criminal acts that are related to domestic violence, but those acts are qualified differently.

UP told "Vijesta" that until June 30 of this year, 187 crimes were committed in this area, as well as 16 crimes that are related to violence, but are otherwise qualified.

"During 2022, the number of victims of criminal acts of domestic violence is 517, of which 137 are male and 380 are female. Of the total number of victims, 71 were minors (30 males and 41 females). In the first half of 2023, the number of victims was 232, 66 male and 166 female. Out of the total number, 37 are minors (24 male and 13 female)", said the Police Administration.

They explain that in such cases, police officers act in accordance with the prescribed legal norms, as well as the Protocol on handling, prevention and protection against violence in the family and against women.

"The police are obliged to record all reported cases of violence, act on reports in a timely manner, and process cases for further proceedings before a misdemeanor or criminal court," said the Administration.

According to the Annual Report on the State Prosecutor's Office, during 2022, 166 victims of the criminal act of violence in the family or family community were registered.

"Regarding the activities of the prosecutor's office in connection with the support of victims and vulnerable persons, and bearing in mind the competences of the state prosecutor's office, they referred to the referral of the aforementioned persons to free legal aid and to the engagement of a confidential person, in accordance with the Law on Protection from Domestic Violence. The process of getting out of a violent relationship is long-term," the 2022 prosecution report states.

Long recovery, victims mentally weakened

Female clients who turn for help are followed through the entire process of leaving the environment of violence. That process, from Podgorica SŽK, takes a long time.

"In practice, we have different cases, so some clients are immediately ready and determined to end an abusive relationship, while others need more time to strengthen themselves and permanently leave an abusive partner. It is important that you know that women go through this process in different ways, so it also happens that, in the meantime, they reconcile with the perpetrator of violence, but most often such cases, after a certain time, still end with the termination of the violent relationship", explained the SŽK -a.

According to the NGO, the phenomenon of violence is extremely complex, so the victim, who is significantly mentally weakened after many years of bullying, cannot always react the way society expects and wants.

"The reasons why a victim of violence decides to return to the abuser are found in collapsed self-confidence and self-esteem...", concludes the NGO.

The situation is alarming in Nikšić as well

The data in Nikšić, when it comes to domestic violence, are not encouraging at all.

According to Radovan Radulović, head of the Nikšić criminal police, the number of cases is increasing year by year.

"In the course of 2023, we already had 22 criminal acts of domestic violence, while last year there were 28. When it comes to the number of violations, it unfortunately hovers around thirty on a monthly basis. We also have the dark side of crime - a large number of unreported cases. The number of criminal acts of domestic violence is around 30 compared to 600 total criminal acts that we have in the territory of Nikšić. As for misdemeanors, we have about 300 on an annual level in the area of ​​violence against the family," said Radulović recently.