For a woman from Nikšić Rajku Dimitrijevic It was completely normal for her to become a foster parent. For years, her mother had opened her doors and heart to children who were at one point left without parental care, and Rajka learned from an early age how great a person is when he “gives those children wings to set off from a warm home to new victories.”
"My mother was a foster mother for many years. We lost our father early on and she fought to bring the four of us on the right path. But she also decided to fight for children who were left without parental care. So I decided to take in one child and raise him alongside my three biological children, to give him love and security. I had no idea it would be on such a large scale," says Rajka, who has been a foster mother for 13 years.
And who welcomed just as many children into her home and into her heart.
"Nine of them have found their way - some have been adopted, some have returned to their biological families, and I currently have four children with me, three of whom are in standard placement and one in urgent care. The door of my home is always open for those urgent cases from the Center for Social Work, with whom I have excellent cooperation, they know that they can call me at half-day and half-night for any child. Two of the children I have with me are children with special needs. It takes a lot of work, sacrifice, care, visits to special education teachers, psychologists, speech therapists, but love is crucial and a person without love cannot do this."
Along with love, there is also the support of her family, and Rajka has the selfless support of her husband and her three, as she emphasizes, biological children. Because the other children are hers too.
"My three biological children, who are now college and high school students, were thrilled when they found out that a child would come to us who would grow up with them, socialize, and be part of our family. They went through all the problems together and we are one big family. The hardest part for us is when those children leave us."
She explains that in most cases, the Social Welfare Center employees brought babies to her who would stay with her for a year or two until they were adopted, or until family problems were resolved and they were returned to their biological family. However, two of the four children currently with her have been members of the Dimitrijević family for six and seven years, respectively.
"In the vast majority of cases, we have become family friends with people who have adopted children or who are the biological parents of those children. The encounters between my family, me and those children, as well as the children who were at one point with us together, are touching. A few days ago, children from the Nikšić kindergarten visited children from Danilovgrad and two children who were with me, they met by chance and recognized each other. They were delighted, and all of that had an impact on the teachers and me. These are beautiful moments, no matter how difficult it is."
She says she will be a foster parent for as long as her health and age allow. Just as she became one thanks to her mother, perhaps one day her daughter will follow the same path.
"All the children call me mom - I'm a 'big' mom. We practice, when we can, taking children who were together at one point to birthday parties, so that they can see each other, so that they don't forget each other. We have some parents, or those who adopted these children, who don't want them to have contact with us and other children, who want to erase that period of their childhood. But, I know that the day will come when I will gather all these people, big and small, when we will all hang out together, and they will see where they spent the earliest days of their childhood, who took care of them, gave them love and the warmth of home."
Silent heroes
Every child is important and everyone deserves the warmth of a parental home, love and attention. If a child is left without that, there are foster parents. That is why it is important to promote foster care as much as possible. This is exactly what the non-governmental association (NGO) “Impuls” from Nikšić and the Center for Support of Local and Regional Development from Herceg Novi have done, which in the past 18 months, during the duration of the project “Every Child Matters - Support to Foster Families, Children in Foster Families and Families at Risk in Nikšić and Herceg Novi”, have drawn attention to foster care. And they have not only drawn attention, but also taken concrete steps.
"We have developed a training program for foster care that is accredited by the Institute for Social and Child Protection, we have conducted training for professional workers who will later train potential foster parents, and in Nikšić and Herceg Novi we organized an Open Day to introduce citizens to foster care and the possibility of becoming one. Seven videos were recorded with numerous public figures from Montenegro on the topic of foster care, and counseling centers dedicated to children in foster care and foster parents were opened in the two mentioned cities," said the project assistant. Marina Doknic, at an event dedicated to the finale of the project.
Foster parents can be families or individuals who are willing and able to provide care and living conditions for a child, and who meet the requirements prescribed by law.
"Many studies have shown that children who grow up in institutions, especially at an early age, can lag behind in psychophysical and emotional development compared to their peers. This is because every child needs that intimate relationship, one-on-one work, which neither the best, most organized institution, nor the most dedicated staff in that institution can provide," she said. Irma Dizdarevic, social worker.
She informed those present about how to become a foster parent, as well as the importance of training courses organized for potential foster parents.
"Foster parents are the silent heroes of our society. No matter how much we talk about foster care, it is not enough, because it is irreplaceable to provide a child with a warm, safe, family environment. There is no other way to do such a great deed as when you take in a child and take care of them. I am proud that we have foster parents and we need to have even more of them," said Dizdarević, who is a foster care educator.
I Maja Marojević believes that talking about foster care is never enough, because it is necessary to promote as much as possible "the most important area of support for children without adequate parental care."
"Foster parents are the most humane people on the planet, because they don't just open the doors of their homes, they also open their hearts to those children, their families. We must all work together to make foster care more accessible," said Marojević, who is a social worker.
The event, where the project results were presented and where Rajka Dimitrijević spoke about what it's like when you open your heart to children without parental care, starting with the verses "Songs about an Abandoned Child" Desanke Maksimović, spoken by a student from the "Mileva Lajović Lalatović" Elementary School Amina JašarevićThe program also included students from the “Dara Čokorilo” Music School, Zoja Minic, Ksenija Saric i Vuk Vujacic, and video clips with celebrities who spoke about the importance of foster care were also shown.
The project "Every Child Matters - Support to Foster Families, Children in Foster Families and Families at Risk in Nikšic and Herceg Novi" was implemented within the framework of the One-Year Action Program for Montenegro for 2020 "Support to Smart and Inclusive Growth - Employment and Social Inclusion" within the IPA II financial perspective, with the financial support of the EU and the Government of Montenegro.
Bonus video:
